Love Is Blue

I have always contended that the reason for our obscenity laws was to officially obscure the observation that the human animal is no different from most other mammals, not to mention birds and reptiles.

Exhibition of sexual organs and other prominent secondary body parts is as natural as a baboon’s blue butt.

But from bundling boards to Mormon underwear we humans, especially the callow Americans, have sought to hide the fact that our bodies are designed, not in the image of any fictional overlord, but as a natural and somewhat random result of millions of years of evolution. Let’s face it. the earth is not flat; evolution is not a hoax; there really are footprints now on the moon; McDonald’s once advertised a Big Mac, fries, a cold drink, and change for a buck; Covid-19 vaccines are not a deep-state conspiracy; morality doesn’t depend on a supreme being; and the best of mankind is still just another animal that eats, shits, fucks, and then dies, not unlike 8.7 million other species..

Alton Brown gave me one of those words-to-live-by that are usually attributed to an old uncle who slipped a quarter into your pocket every time you visited: he said to never buy a gadget that only has one use. This was good advice until I found myself unable to cut up my steak even though my handy multi-tool provided both a kinfe and a fork, not to mention a button hook, a cork screw, and tweezers. Oh, the knife cut beautifully but I had to hold the meat down with my elbow.

Here’s where mother nature runs into a problem: humans are very versatile. They can do many things, and if they come up short, they design a tool to overcome the problem. Not every human is the same in the details (I cannot speak Mandarin yet I can knit a sweater) but in the macro view we’re all pretty much interchangeable. Except the weak-ass males of the species seem to have evolved without the ability to procreate. They do, however, tend to bully and shout, pound gavels and throw shoes, and are far too ready to inflict violence on other humans who might stand up to their blustering, especially females.

But when you strip off all the veneers of civilization, we’re still just animals. animals that think they’re special, and they’re not. Do you think a rampaging bear will consider your level of education or the size of your bank account as he turns you into food?

Sorry for the rant. Here’s a fun perpective on the way of the world.

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